New Lingo for the “New Circus”

“Fabric” is a term the Circus Smirkus kids, a lively bunch, toss around, I guess to describe the act of working what a Sarasota insider calls “ the bed sheets.” I think this precious act evolved from the old web routine.

Here’s how that same Sarasota smarty described the setting for last year’s Ringless Bros. Circus: “A parking lot.”

Following are my own earnest efforts to recast circus terminology in a more modern spotlight, acceptable to fussy spectators of unmessy, blood-free stuff:

Equestrian Foreplay: Today’s nouveau horse trainers (excuse that inelegant expression) at shows like Cavalia make a point to prove a loving, wholly egalitarian relationship to their ring partners.

Menage Adagio: A threesome intricately related in a series of movements denoting esthetic horniness.

Astro Marionettes: Wire walkers (please pardon that crude term) rigged to lifelines work the safest area of the arena or tent.

PETA Pachyderm: The "new circus" elephant that does nothing. At last, the Ringling chorus girls do it all. Next stage: the Bulls present the Broads.

Bozo Break: A time-consuming audience participation gag designed to save management the cost of hiring real circus acts. (aka: A Larible)

Plank Vaulting: what they do at Circus Eloise, adapting the old pole vaulting routine into something much safer and wider, thus allowing for a great number of amateurs to make the delicate cut.

Hyper-Posturing. Typically, these are the sidebar characters at a Cirque du Soleil show who cavort gloriously during high points of an act in progress. They make a point rarely to look directly at the audience.

The list no doubt will grow as “new circus” developments merit precious news euphemisms. Tune back here later. As I walk the FDA-approved sawdust of a safe new circus, I may be struck by additional euphemistic epiphanies.

And yours?

8.5.07